NO! NO! NO ELANOR! ELANOR NO! NO MAM! I said NO!
"No" is the word of the year. I fire it at my one year old about every five minutes. I feel like a NO siren. When they start moving around, touching, exploring, or just THINKING about stuff you will learn many ways to say NO!--I really enjoy saying her full name instead of no sometimes and now I finally understand why I sit straight up when I hear mine. :)
So it was pretty simple at first. She got it. It was great. I would simply watch her and say "no" when she was about to hit the danger zone. I was a parenting goddess! Then the tables turned. My little angel became a tyrant. She laughed when I said it. She ignored it and turned on the dishwasher anyway. She froze for a second, looked at me, and continued to turn the oven knobs. She heard "no" and charged for whatever she wanted. SMART KID!
So like any brilliant mother I started trying different approaches as follows.....
-restraining her arms and saying NO while pointing at desired object (she hates that)
-spatting the little hand (I hate that)
-saying NO and moving her to another room (the distraction method)
none of these worked great as toddlers are determined and stubborn and they are testing themselves, not just you.
My brilliant sister-in-law Stephanie sent me an article regarding praise and discipline. Basically, it said to manage the tone of your "NO!" by how important it is. If she throws food on the floor, that's a mild no-no. If she is turning the knob on the gas stove that's a BIG NO! The urgency in your voice is noted because she doesn't understand what I'm saying.
Also, it said to show her consequences of her actions and have her help you "clean it up" or "put it back" and PRAISE HER WHEN SHE DOES SO. It was hard to remember to do this, but the results have been AMAZING!!!!
related link:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_the-discipline-tool-kit-successful-strategies-for-every-age_1475318.bc
102 and counting...
So my little angel is not a complainer. She is currently cutting four teeth. The pediatrician will tell you that they don't run fever when they are teething, but trust me---THEY DO! So, anyhooo back to it--she has been fussy to say the least. Well, all the sudden she had yellow ooze coming from her eyes so we took her to the doctor. She had an ear infection in both ears. I just thought it was the teething! They gave her an antibiotic. She took that for two days and she still would wake up with eyes matted shut. So we called the doc again and they gave her a different antibiotic.
Here's what you should know about this:
When you switch antibiotics you are starting over completely. It's like the infection is brand new again.
She started running a fever that day. That night it went up to 102. Her heart was beating so fast it really scared me. Also, she was panting. I was FREAKING. We called the after hours line and the doctor told us that this is normal. Ya hear that??? Very rapid heartbeat is normal for babies with fever.
I was relieved finding this out. The doc told us to give her a dose and a half of tylenol and let her rest and if it reaches 104 to call again or go to the emergency room. Also, that anything under 102 is considered a low grade fever. Stripping them down to diaper and socks and putting a wet wash cloth on their head or back or chest helps draw the fever out as well.
Here's what you should know about this:
When you switch antibiotics you are starting over completely. It's like the infection is brand new again.
She started running a fever that day. That night it went up to 102. Her heart was beating so fast it really scared me. Also, she was panting. I was FREAKING. We called the after hours line and the doctor told us that this is normal. Ya hear that??? Very rapid heartbeat is normal for babies with fever.
I was relieved finding this out. The doc told us to give her a dose and a half of tylenol and let her rest and if it reaches 104 to call again or go to the emergency room. Also, that anything under 102 is considered a low grade fever. Stripping them down to diaper and socks and putting a wet wash cloth on their head or back or chest helps draw the fever out as well.
Peeing on a Stick to Parentdom
I remember it all very well. Something was amiss. I felt weird. My boobs were a tiny bit sore, but nothing to take note of. I was not nauseated. I just felt, well...weird. My vision was off. My head felt light....but I wasn't dizzy. Little did I know that I would end up peeing on little piece of technology that would say, "Yes girl, you are pregnant".
First thoughts....O-MA GOD, O-MA GOD, O-MA GOD, O-MA GOD!!!! How did this happen??? Well, I know how it happened. What am I going to do???? Should I call Justin right now or wait until he gets off work? PANIC PANIC PANIC. I'll call my mom, she will know what to do.......
She laughed at me. So then I called my sister......
And SHE laughed at me too and reminded me that I was almost 30 and I was fine.....
Then I called Justin. That's right, I told him over the phone AND I told him third. I cried the whole time. I freaked out all over him. No magical moment of "Honey! Guess what? I'm having your baby! Isn't that fantastic!!!!!" Nope. I was a mess. I wasn't planning on having a little one and I sure as hell wasn't in my right mind at that time. I cried and worried pretty much through that night. I wasn't upset that I was pregnant, I was just plain scared.
The rest of the night was a brain storm. I went through every sexual encounter in the past month that we had shared trying to pinpoint which one it was. I tried to imagine myself as a mother and Justin as a father. I thought of every bad thing I had ever done in my life and wondered how that would effect my future child and in what way? I babbled prayers over and over that didn't make much sense. I thought about beers I had the other week and if my child would come out with a third ear because of it. The "crazy" took over for a night. One night, that's all I gave myself to grieve for my youth, which had been over for a while anyway--let's face it.
The next day I put my big girl panties on.
I woke up and life was different. Everything was about the mass of bonded cells in my body that would eventually be a living, breathing human being (and what a cute one she turned out to be). I took a couple more pregnancy tests, and for any of you who have never tried peeing on a stick-it's not as easy as it sounds. I suggest getting a plastic solo cup and peeing in that THEN putting the stick down in it--otherwise you end up with a wet hand and that's just not cool. I was definitely pregnant four tests later.
I got a new job that would support our family. I wore gloves when cleaning. I quit smoking, drinking, caffeine, sugar, fatty foods, artificial sweeteners and started exercising. I bought books. I started a journal. I was going to be a powerhouse of MOTHER! The first trimester was really something special for me. I threw up on myself on the way to work a couple of times. My clothes were a little tight, so I just looked like I had a beer gut. All the foods I loved and adored made me ill. The smell of bacon was unnerving. I was a human siren. I screamed my little head off about anything that displeased the Queen (aka ME). Once, I threw a cup of water at my kind, lovely husband. He just stood there staring at me, all wet--by the way, men LOVE these temper tantrums, it is OH SO sexy. No seriously though--the hormones take a sec to get used to.
My second trimester was glorious. The nausea went away. You could tell I was pregnant and not fatty. I could eat again, but only half of my plate before I was so full I could pop and then other half I wanted within the next hour--another weird preggo thing. People started noticing I was preggo and I there were congratulations and bonding with women. I didn't have the weight gain in my face and I looked SO cute in my maternity clothes.
The third trimester I blew up. I had to buy new maternity clothes because the others didn't fit anymore. My belly would show along with other things I didn't want to show. My belly button was poking through my shirt and co-workers thought that was just hilarious! JERKS! I began seeing her move an entire arm across my stomach. Random people in the elevator or on the phone or on the street began telling me horrible stories about how they haven't slept in years or how their epidural didn't work and how much pain they were in and how sick their kids got.....why do people do that??? I was close to delivery and I was afraid of the pain and basically of passing a human through my vagina in general and these insights weren't helping.
She loved her home in my body. So much, that she went past her due date and we had to induce. My delivery went well. She was 8 lbs and 2 oz's. When they laid her on my chest something magical happened when she heard my voice. I heard the drums of all the women that came before me in my head. I was no longer the end of a chain, but a link.
It's been a quite a ride so far. Parentdom makes you feel Parent"dumb" most of the time. Having a child and trying to figure out how to keep it healthy and happy is a challenge. You hear doctors say words you've never heard. You cry when they get shots. You worry if you are doing things right. It can push you to limits. Sometimes it can be scary. I'll be posting a few of my AHA! moments. Please feel free to post what has worked for you as well.
To all you new parents, hang in there.
Kristi
First thoughts....O-MA GOD, O-MA GOD, O-MA GOD, O-MA GOD!!!! How did this happen??? Well, I know how it happened. What am I going to do???? Should I call Justin right now or wait until he gets off work? PANIC PANIC PANIC. I'll call my mom, she will know what to do.......
She laughed at me. So then I called my sister......
And SHE laughed at me too and reminded me that I was almost 30 and I was fine.....
Then I called Justin. That's right, I told him over the phone AND I told him third. I cried the whole time. I freaked out all over him. No magical moment of "Honey! Guess what? I'm having your baby! Isn't that fantastic!!!!!" Nope. I was a mess. I wasn't planning on having a little one and I sure as hell wasn't in my right mind at that time. I cried and worried pretty much through that night. I wasn't upset that I was pregnant, I was just plain scared.
The rest of the night was a brain storm. I went through every sexual encounter in the past month that we had shared trying to pinpoint which one it was. I tried to imagine myself as a mother and Justin as a father. I thought of every bad thing I had ever done in my life and wondered how that would effect my future child and in what way? I babbled prayers over and over that didn't make much sense. I thought about beers I had the other week and if my child would come out with a third ear because of it. The "crazy" took over for a night. One night, that's all I gave myself to grieve for my youth, which had been over for a while anyway--let's face it.
The next day I put my big girl panties on.
I woke up and life was different. Everything was about the mass of bonded cells in my body that would eventually be a living, breathing human being (and what a cute one she turned out to be). I took a couple more pregnancy tests, and for any of you who have never tried peeing on a stick-it's not as easy as it sounds. I suggest getting a plastic solo cup and peeing in that THEN putting the stick down in it--otherwise you end up with a wet hand and that's just not cool. I was definitely pregnant four tests later.
I got a new job that would support our family. I wore gloves when cleaning. I quit smoking, drinking, caffeine, sugar, fatty foods, artificial sweeteners and started exercising. I bought books. I started a journal. I was going to be a powerhouse of MOTHER! The first trimester was really something special for me. I threw up on myself on the way to work a couple of times. My clothes were a little tight, so I just looked like I had a beer gut. All the foods I loved and adored made me ill. The smell of bacon was unnerving. I was a human siren. I screamed my little head off about anything that displeased the Queen (aka ME). Once, I threw a cup of water at my kind, lovely husband. He just stood there staring at me, all wet--by the way, men LOVE these temper tantrums, it is OH SO sexy. No seriously though--the hormones take a sec to get used to.
My second trimester was glorious. The nausea went away. You could tell I was pregnant and not fatty. I could eat again, but only half of my plate before I was so full I could pop and then other half I wanted within the next hour--another weird preggo thing. People started noticing I was preggo and I there were congratulations and bonding with women. I didn't have the weight gain in my face and I looked SO cute in my maternity clothes.
The third trimester I blew up. I had to buy new maternity clothes because the others didn't fit anymore. My belly would show along with other things I didn't want to show. My belly button was poking through my shirt and co-workers thought that was just hilarious! JERKS! I began seeing her move an entire arm across my stomach. Random people in the elevator or on the phone or on the street began telling me horrible stories about how they haven't slept in years or how their epidural didn't work and how much pain they were in and how sick their kids got.....why do people do that??? I was close to delivery and I was afraid of the pain and basically of passing a human through my vagina in general and these insights weren't helping.
She loved her home in my body. So much, that she went past her due date and we had to induce. My delivery went well. She was 8 lbs and 2 oz's. When they laid her on my chest something magical happened when she heard my voice. I heard the drums of all the women that came before me in my head. I was no longer the end of a chain, but a link.
It's been a quite a ride so far. Parentdom makes you feel Parent"dumb" most of the time. Having a child and trying to figure out how to keep it healthy and happy is a challenge. You hear doctors say words you've never heard. You cry when they get shots. You worry if you are doing things right. It can push you to limits. Sometimes it can be scary. I'll be posting a few of my AHA! moments. Please feel free to post what has worked for you as well.
To all you new parents, hang in there.
Kristi
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